Having better headlamps in Bangalore is a crime

If you happened to catch Times of India dated 13^th April, 2008 (Sunday); they have news about how the Bangalore Police have registered around 500 cases of vehicles using “flashy” lights. Now I know, considering the rather ‘Speed-ed Up’ attitude of the Bangalore youth, there are quite a few irritating headlamps on the road; the kind that flashes, like an Aircraft lamp, when it’s parked. Those are really irritating.

But one should also know that many of the new cars (like Honda Accord, Skoda Laurent, etc) come with Xenon lamps. The basic purpose of a headlamp is to illuminate the road without distracting the vehicle coming from the opposite side. But is there a fool proof solution with the Bangalore Police which will determine which headlamp causes discomfort. The obvious and sad truth is no. The world is moving forward to a world illuminated by xenon lamps and LED lighting for vehicles. LEDs are proven to be energy efficient, highly directional and widely illuminating. But the law and order in Bangalore hits unknown lows and stinks with the odor of brainlessness.

The Bangalore Police believes that any headlamp which is white colored (rather than the dull orange of regular headlamps) is bad for eyes. They go to the extent of proclaiming that such headlamps causes blindness. If you look at it theoretically, looking at the setting sun damages your eyes. Will the Bangalore Police go to the extent of giving a challan to the Sun? In this very out worldly real world of Bangalore and its various rules and regulations, that is an event that’s waiting to happen.

The Bangalore Traffic Police needed a casualty to finally install some reflectors along the median of the Inner Ring Road. Along with that they drew the lanes of the wide road. Again, reiterating, they needed a casualty for this. Is there a casualty for this drive against bright white light? None I could find. Have there been any complaints against vehicles using such lights? Again the answer is no. Then the sole and rather obvious purpose of this drive to crackdown on such ‘harmful’ light is to make the light pockets of many in the law and order department a little heavier.

Kudos to Bangalore police for once again turning the clock back.

Marshall Montgomery on Leadership

“The leader must have infectious optimism and the determination to persevere in the face of difficulties. He must also radiate confidence, even when he himself is not too certain about them. The final test of a leader is the feeling you have when you leave his presence after a conference. Have you a feeling of uplift and confidence?”

- Field Marshall Montgomery (as quoted in ‘Ogilvy on Advertising’)

Krazzy Bollywood

“Save the industry!!! Stop buying pirated cds and dvds… buy original!!!”

In any other country I would have said “Ok fine… you made something truly awesome and original… heres my dime, yen, cents, penny, paise for your work.”

But Nah! Not Bollywood… no way… half the music of this industry is plagiarized without due mention of the original.

I know for a fact that these songs are copied:

1) Kya Mujhe Pyaar Hai – Woh Lamhe

2) Yeh ishq hai – Jab We Met

3) Aao Milo Chale – Jab We Met

4) Pehli Nazar Mein – Race

5) Ya Ali – Gangster

Incidentally all the above are by Pritam; who is hailed as the most successful composer. We have qawwali, carnatic classical, Hindustani classical, tonnes of folk songs, all these to be inspired from; but no, we go to Indonesia, Finland, France to copy music. For more on copying please do visit www.itwofs.com

But finally, someone seems to have won something. Ram Sampath (Music Director: Khakee) won a court case against Krazzy4 for copying his an ad jingle he’s composed for Sony Ericsson.

But am I relieved? Apparently, no.

Picture courtesy PassionforCinema.com

An i-doser Q&A

For starters, the i-doser is an application which plays binaural audio (jargonified freaky sounds) which stimulates your brains to give you the effect of various drugs (among others). I had decent results with i-doser and I was a skeptic.

For a very in-depth research on i-doser click here.

Let me try answering a few of the regular concerns:

1) Does it work?
A: Binaural audio HAS to work. Many years back i had seen an article about a Tantric (Saint) in Japan. He had many disciples who went week after week to meet this guy. The Jap cops found him to be a major fraud who was into other shitty business; what they were clueless about was how he got so many disciples. They checked everything, no success with drugs. Finally someone checked a tape of one of his prayer sessions. They analyzed it and VOILA... the recorded prayers were layered over Binaural sound. They edited the prayer and played only the Binaural part. I can still remember my feeling... it was scary scary sound.

2) Placebo?
A: No. I don't think so. Why not? See below.

3) Why restful state of mind and lying down and all that shit, when a real drug doesn't need all that?
A: The real drug ACTUALLY alters you chemical structure. There are ACTUAL changes happening inside you. We, as mortal human beings, don't have control over the chemical composition of our blood. We cannot manipulate it. A drug can; and easily. Thats why its a straight out trip. Whereas, the i-doser works through sounds stimulating brain waves. And we have a more direct control with our brain than with our blood stream. We can forcefully start thinking and analyzing so that our brain remains occupied and unaffected by stimulus. I can argue on the same defense that you can quell down a marijuana trip the same way. Thats the reason why the relaxed state requirement. Oh by the way, it is actually difficult to relax your brain, thats why meditation is so niche.

4) How are the trips?
A: Not bad actually. Like a few people had mentioned; you feel REMs. Oh yeah, really thats freakish. Rapid Eye Movement they say happens only during dreams. So this has to be something. And weird dreams, dreams that you can feel and experience; but unfortunately, I couldn't remember them. A creepy stuff happened when I actually heard someone shout in my dream, and the sound just dissolved into the binaural audio. I swear i could feel that shout just melting into the sound through the headphones.
That said, the trips are really not all that great when compared to the real stuff. For example, their DMT trip promised cosmos and planets and all bull crap and I didnt see any of that. But the trip was good. Acid trip was a load of face twitching and real fun.

So there, now its upto you to make whatever of it. Try it, its fun, and quite effective, like their Calm ME. That made me feel good through the day, and trust me it was a rather nasty day that. Placebo? Why should I care when it actually worked. All you sceptics get me something else (another placebo even) to make me feel good, I will take it.

Update: The anesthesia dose works; and how! My whole left leg was numb.

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Bendi goes bowling

Bendi kicks himself up into action

Sex sells...

and even the lowest denominator of Indian business men knows this tactic.

This here is a picture of a board showcasing their work. 'Lover basement' is as erotic as it gets when it comes to ads.


PS: If anyone knows a flat with a 'Lover Basement' please intimate me. I would definitely love to put my money in it.

The Great Indian Swiss Kabab

I will really be wondering what the Swiss has to do with Kababs. But if any of you have any idea about Swiss Kababs, ENLIGHTEN ME!